Tell me where it hurts
by Martin-J-Christopher-Freeman
Summary: The Doctor's ganger was given a chance to live, to explore the universe, to love, but what if that just isn't enough? He'll never truly be The Doctor, will he? His Tenth self and River's ganger try to show him he is the same man as he always has been, and unfortunatley they're right because The Doctor had to make decisions, and here he was, saving River.
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER: DOCTOR WHO BELONGS TO THE BBC.**

**A/N: THIS IS ANOTHER FICLET THAT I SHOULDN'T BE WRITING AS I HAVE A WHOLE LOAD OF OTHER FICLETS I SHOULD BE CONCENTRATING ON BUT THE IDEA HAS BEEN GOING ROUND AND ROUND IN MY HEAD NON STOP FOR THE PAST WEEK AND I JUST CAN'T CONCENTRATE ON ANYTHING ELSE. I ALWAYS DID FEEL SORRY FOR THE DOCTORS GANGER SO I GUESS THIS IS MY WAY OF SAYING NO MATTER WHAT FORM THE DOCTOR'S IN I WILL ALWAYS LOVE HIM. **

**A/N2: I WOULD JUST LIKE TO THANK ' WANNABE DARKLORD' FOR REVEIWING ON THIS STORY AND TELLING ME WHERE I HAD GONE WRONG GRAMMER AND PUCTUATION WISE. I SHALL TRY TO IMPROVE THIS BUT I CAN'T PROMISE TO BE PERFECT AS I AM STILL NEW TO THE WRITING END OF THINGS BUT IF YOU DO SEE ANY AREAS WHERE I COULD IMPROVE I WOULD BE GRATEFUL IF YOU TOLD ME SO I CAN CORRECT THEM AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. THANK YOU.**

Even as his thumb brushed against the cold, metallic button on his sonic screwdriver The Doctor or as Amy had called him so spitefully earlier,' The not quite Doctor' knew that this was probably the last act of sacrifice for the universe that he would ever commit. But the universe wasn't big enough for him anymore, and perhaps it was for the best after all he had no TARDIS anymore and his friends didn't trust him at all, and without his old girl and the people around him that he cared about his life was as pointless as an unsharpened pencil. Even his memories weren't really his, and without the memories that had made him The Doctor previously he was now a blank sheet of paper without a past and without a purpose. His past consisted of being made out of a pile of white gloop and since he wasn't The Doctor anymore, he was just an insignificant life that nobody really gave a damn about.

The original hims voice broke into the inky black depths of his mind. " your molecular structure can survive this, you know. It may not be the end. " Even though those words were full of confidence he could tell that it was masked with pain and a lie. He took a deep breath as the monstrosity was nearly closing in on him and closed his eyes, and at last placed pressure on the button. He heard a loud click before his atoms were ripped apart and he landed on the floor in a messy pool of liquid.

After that it became one big hazy fuzz of blackness and he was sent flying in a blur of chaos. He was twisted and manipulated and squeezed and flipped, almost as if he was putty in someone's hands. Every muscle ached, and his skin sizzled as he felt himself slowly being knitted back together, cell by cell and suddenly he felt himself make impact with something hard. He groaned but lay perfectly still, not that he could really move anyway as everything hurt too much, and besides he didn't know if he'd landed in one piece or if part of him was still mere atoms. He was alive so that was a good thing right? Or had he really died back then? That's when the screams started, his screams. They started in his mind as whispers but they gradually got louder and louder until they were almost too much to bare and somehow they escaped his lips. They were uncontrollable, screeching yells of agony and grief for the life he had once had that wasn't his to live anymore. They wracked his body and sent him flailing into a tired heap as he coiled in on himself. He could tell he was crying from the feeling of dampness he felt on what he presumed was his cheeks. " Please somebody help!" His voice cracked into a small and pathetic whimper. He tried to concentrate all his energy on opening his eyes, but it was an utter waste of time as they seemed to be glued shut and refused to budge. His head began to throb painfully as what little energy he had left drained from him.

He heard footsteps running towards him and for a moment he's flooded with relief, someone's found him and he's going to brought out of the dark and into salvation but that feeling quickly fades as soon as he hears the voice that belongs to his saviour. " Steady." His hearts clenched so hard in his chest that he almost forgot to breath. It couldn't be, it was impossible ." Shhh. It's ok now, you're safe. " He felt long slender arms wrap around his waist and lever him up and to his surprise he felt graceful fingers slide down his cheek, wiping away his tears. " Please be ok! I don't think I can handle much more death today. " The oh so familiar voice whispered in his ear mournfully. That was it, the breaking point. He didn't care if it hurt like hell, he didn't care if the universe was going to explode if he laid eyes on the person carrying him, he had just stopped caring full stop. He gasped as his eyelids finally lifted slightly allowing a shaft of bright light in. " Hello. "

He blinked hazily, and shook his head to try and lift the fog that was glazing his eyes. He felt an amused chuckle vibrate through him, only making him more determined to find out if his new brain had indeed turned to mush and was just playing tricks on him. As his vision cleared he could see big, hazelnut eyes staring down at him. Those eyes belonged to an attractive man with crazy light brown hair, which seemed to have a life of it's own . The man had a long, angular face and smooth, pale skin which intrigued him and for some reason all he wanted to do was stroke it. Though as he reached out, and much to the mans surprise touched the mans face he jerked backwards, his brain registering what he had just done . He could feel the heat rising in his cheeks and he could tell that he was blushing bright red. He buried his head in the mans chest in embarrassment but this only gained another chuckle. This was wrong on so many levels ; on a paradoxical level but as much as anything on an emotional level as well. For a moment he had convinced himself that he wasn't alone in the universe, and all was well but then reality had hit him like a ton of bricks. He was alone and still had no belonging, but what made it harder was a man that he used to be but hadn't ever been was cradling him in his arms and he was quite sure that time was being rewritten right this very second and if time was rewritten then perhaps the original Doctor wouldn't have met Amy, or perhaps he wouldn't have gone to the factory and if that happened the him now wouldn't have been created. " Are you ok? " His tenth self peered down at him worriedly. " You took a pretty bad knock to the head just now. Perhaps you've got concussion. "

" I'm fine. " He growled and grabbed on tighter to his tenth self's blue suit in anger, oh how he had missed that suit.

" Oh how rude of me, I haven't even introduced myself yet have I. I'm The Doctor and before you ask it's just The Doctor. " Wow did I really speak like that ? I sound so smug and arrogant he thought to himself. " Now that just leaves the question , who are you ? " His tenth incarnation grinned and poked him in the chest making him hiss in pain, everything was still so sore. " Sorry. Where does it hurt? " The question was asked so tenderly that it almost went unheard.

" Well to answer your first question I'm a nobody, my name really doesn't matter. As for your second question, everywhere. " He sighed sorrowfully.

" I've never met anyone who's a nobody before. " His tenth self quirked his left eyebrow up out of habit. " Tell me your name. "

He rolled his eyes and thought long and had about what he was going to say next. " I suppose you could call me Eleven point two. "

" Eleven point two? " Ten as he had decided to call him inside his head from now on was shaking his head in disbelief.

He could feel a yawn making it's way up his throat before he could even stop it in it's tracks. " you must be tired. You can stay in my room for tonight if you want. " As much as he hated to admit it his past self was right, he was absolutely whacked with fatigue. He was already nodding off and was just about aware of being carried along the coridors and being gently placed on a warm and soft mattress.

" Don't go. Please stay here tonight . " He whispered underneath his breath as he felt Ten's grip on him leave him. He heard the squeak of the springs in the bed and felt the mattress move down an inch. He smiled gleefully in his sleep in the knowledge of a warm presence beside him.

**I WOULD BE EVER SO GRATEFUL IF YOU TOOK A FEW MINUTES OF YOUR TIME TO LEAVE A REVIEW AND LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK OF THIS STORY XXX. **

**NEXT CHAPTER COMING SOON...**


	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAIMER: DOCTOR WHO BELONGS TO THE BBC.**

**A/N: THANKS TO ANYONE WHO'S FAVED/ALERTED AND TO MY FIRST TWO REVEIWERS WANNABE DARKLORD AND THISDAYANDAGE. HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY READING THIS SECOND CHAPTER. AND TO ANSWER THISDAYANDAGE'S QUESTION : THIS IS THE ORIGINAL TENTH DOCTOR NOT THE DUPLICATE AND YES IT'S VERY TIMEY-WIMEY BUT ALL SHALL BE EXPLAINED LATER IN THE STORY ON HOW TIME WILL STICH ITSELF BACK TOGETHER. **

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><p>The Doctor's ganger was dreaming, something he rarely did anymore since he had fought in the time war and had seen countless amounts of horrors that are always scratched behind his eyelids and not far from mind. ( Not me the original Doctor. I'm just stuck with his memories, he thought to himself sadly). Sleeping was a way for many people to escape life but for him it meant reliving life, (somebody else's life) and that wasn't something he planned to do, he had too many regrets to relive. However it was a choice toss up between waking up and dealing with reality or facing whatever horrors that were waiting for him inside the murky depths of his mind, so he decided he'd carry on dreaming besides it wasn't as if much was happening anyway, it was a rather boring dream so far.<p>

He was encompassed in darkness that seemed to be never-ending, not a star in the sky to light his way. Wherever he was, it was tranquil, not even a pinprick of sound, just complete silence rolling out into the night but not the sort of silence that would usually cause him to grow tense, it was comfortable and he was utterly at peace.

Out of the pitch black a beautiful woman stepped out of nowhere but not just any ordinary woman, it was the TARDIS in her human form. She was encompassed in golden residual time vortex energy, shedding light and illuminating his surroundings. He shielded his eyes and looked around in fascination, It was his old TARDIS that he had had back in his tenth body. The interior was breathtaking, he'd forgotten just how gorgeous she'd been, not that she'd ever stopped being gorgeous but he just really loved her like this. The lights reflected of the twisting coral in just the right way and made it look as though the room was actually glowing bright orange. " Oh, old girl you really are spectacular . " He tapped his fingers on the surface of her walls gently and grinned.

" Thank you, my Doctor. " He blinked and turned his attention to the human form of the TARDIS who had just spoken for the first time since her appearance in his dream world.

" Don't call me that. " He flapped his arms around in a fluster and sighed deeply.

" Why? Isn't that who you are Timelord? " Her voice tinkled, like music so sweet and fragile like glass about to break.

" I'm a shadow of that man. A copy. " He stated.

" No, you're so much more than that. " She looked at him with big, sorrowful eyes and smiled fondly.

" You're wrong. The universe may be big but it's not big enough for the both of us. " The Doctor ran a hand through his thick mop of hair.

"I've known you since you were a child Doctor, we've been through so much. " She stepped closer to him and cupped his chin, her touch seemed to burn him but he didn't even attempt to pull away.

" No ! I think you mean you went through so much with The Doctor, not some clone that was made to look like him and was formed from a mass of gloop. " His voice broke and he tried to look away from her as his eyes began to well with tears but she held his chin in a tight, inescapable grip.

She giggled and shook her head. " Doctor I've been with you for nearly over nine hundred years and I've loved every one of your incarnations, why should I stop loving you now?"

" But… " He protested but was cut short by her shimmering finger being placed on his lips.

" Shh now Doctor. It's what matters in here that I really care about. " She grinned and tapped on each side of his chest where his only recently formed heart thudded. I wouldn't care if you had six arms and three heads, you'd still be my Doctor. That's why I had to save you. " He shook his head in disbelief.

" You - WHAT!" He yelled and struggled away from her, finally managing to loosen her grip. He took a step back from her and stared at her in disbelief.

" I transported your molecular structure to a past TARDIS matrix and rebuilt you atom by atom. " She explained.

" Do you have any idea what you've done! Time is being rewritten right this minute! I'm crossing my own timeline! " He spat out angrily. " I'm asleep with my past incarnation right by my side! Who knows what sort of implications this could cause! " He grabbed at his hair madly and tried to slow his fast, rugged breathing.

" He needs you. " She said icily, he'd obviously upset her. She span around and began walking away, taking the light with her and leaving him once again alone in the dark.

" Please don't leave me! " He shouted after her desperately.

" I'll never leave you. " Her voice carried as though it was just a rustle of leaves in warm autumn air, then there was a quiet.

" Come back! " He screamed out into the sea of nothingness but this time got no response. He dropped to his knees and banged his fist hard on the TARDIS floor. " Please. " He swallowed as a hard lump formed in his throat and his tears began to fall freely down his cheeks.

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><p>Back in reality The Tenth Doctor was awoken from his light doze by a sudden heavy weight weighing him down, and something hitting him hard on the chest repeatedly, almost knocking the air straight out his lungs. His eyes flew open and for a moment he was disorientated by where he was, but as his eyes adjusted to the dark he could just make out the form of the man that had quite literally appeared from nowhere. The man was huddled practically on his lap and was pounding his fists onto his chest forcefully. Currently the both of them were lying on his rarely used bed. He had wanted to leave the strange man to rest in peace and quiet, he had looked like he needed it. But the man had pleaded for him to stay and that plea was one both his hearts couldn't refuse. He placed a hand on the mans back to try and push him off as gently as possible but a soon as he did so vibrations seemed to travel from the man and all the way up the whole length of his arm. The man was in blatant distress, tears streaming from his eyes and dampening his cheeks for the second time since The Doctor had found him, tremors wracking his body, strangled screams caught in his throat and his fists which had now stopped hitting him so hard were scrunched up so much his skin was going white . The Doctor started running a hand through the mans hair in an attempt to comfort him, he found himself amazed at just how dense and silky it was, he was almost jealous of it. Almost.<p>

He smiled as the man seemed to relax at his touch and despite the awkwardness of both of their positions, he found he didn't mind that much and was just happy pondering about the peculiar man. He had said his name was Eleven point two, but surely that wasn't his actual name. Perhaps it was a riddle, ooooh he loved riddles. Perhaps the man was totally bonkers and off his rocker or maybe that knock to the head could of done some actual brain damage and the man didn't remember his name. The man himself was an oddity, despite his boyish looks he was dressed like a crazed professor. His tweed jacket and shirt had looked slightly singed , one of his braces had snapped and he had been and probably still was in a lot of pain. Though it was his eyes that had caught his attention, not the fact that they were such a dazzling green but the loss, tragedy and true age that they contained. He was fairly sure that whoever the man was, he wasn't human. For one no human would of probably survived the trauma he had just been through, and no human could carry that much past in their eyes. He needed a new companion, to set him straight when he got out of line like he had earlier today on mars, someone to calm the Timelord victorious part of him. He'd been on the verge of having a complete mental breakdown and had been on his last strand of sanity when the so called ' Eleven point two' had showed up in a crying mess on the TARDIS console floor, he had proved to be just the sort of distraction he needed. As soon as the man awoke he would run a health check on him just to make sure he hadn't got any long lasting damage, then he'd ask him if he wanted to stay and travel. Of course that's if he didn't want to go back home to wherever he had come from, presuming he had a home that is. But he had a funny feeling the man lying on his lap needed him as much as he needed the man. And with that in mind he nodded off into a casual nap with one hand placed on the mans back to stop him falling off onto the floor and his other placed in the mans crazy mop of hair.

**PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW XXX**


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER: DOCTOR WHO BELONGS TO THE BBC.**

**A/N: A HUGE THANKS GOES TO ANYONE WHO HAS ALERTED/FAVED AND TO THISDAYANDAGE AND DOCTORWHO SHALL RULE THE WORLD FOR REVIEWING ON CHAPTER 2... YOUR SUPPORT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME. OH AND BY THE WAY THE GANGER DOCTOR REFERS TO HIMSELF AS THE NOT QUITE DOCTOR, WELL AT LEAST FOR NOW ANYWAY WHILST TEN WILL REFER TO HIM AS ELEVEN POINT TWO. **

*** This chapter has been reuploded as I made a couple of mistakes and I needed to correct them* **

The not quite Doctor groaned and shifted slightly as he felt reality slowly creeping into the roots of his mind. He was lying on something soft and warm, and he really didn't want to wake up, but he supposed waking up would be a start to get himself out the mess his TARDIS had gotten him into. He did love the old girl profoundly but perhaps it was time he left… but what to do next was a complete mystery to him. If he left for Earth he'd have to do boring humany things … oh god he'd have to buy a house! And worse than that he would have to get employed and have a boring job! He would be stuck in one time and one place for the rest of his life! And just because he was a ganger now didn't mean he wouldn't regenerate, well in principle he was still a fully fledged Timelord, that only meant life would be a very long time, a very long and tedious life on Earth. He'd have to find a new identify, a new way of life, and at the same time he would have try to avoid the real Doctor at all costs. He reluctantly opened his eyes. The first thought that popped into his mind as his eyes opened and he was met with a dull blackness was ' Ahhh help I've gone blind', however as he felt his eyelashes brush against something made of material he realised he was just lying face down, probably in the tenth Doctors bed covers.

He lifted his head slightly, only to regret it as he was met with a nice view of Ten's long slender legs. He gulped and glanced up at the still peacefully sleeping face of his past incarnation. He felt himself flush, how long had he been lying on Ten's lap? Hopefully not long enough for him to notice. Ok you can get your self out of this as long as you move now he thought to himself, as he tried to wriggle back onto the other side of the bed. His hearts froze as he felt Ten's skinny arms wrap around his waist tightly. He sighed in frustration and flopped back onto Ten as any escape was made totally impossible. He tilted his head slightly so it was leaning against Ten's chest and smiled to himself as he let the twin heart beats thrumming beneath Ten's ribcage calm him. There would be a hell of a lot of explaining to do when the sleeping man awoke. " Mmmh. " His former incarnation murmured and smirked in his sleep. The younger mans face screwed up as his eyes began to flicker open. Shocked brown eyes met equally shocked green ones. " Hello. " He greeted Ten.

" Oh. " Ten's eyes wandered to where his arms were still enveloping Eleven point two's waist. He jerked backwards. " Sorry. I just didn't want you to fall and hurt yourself. " He blurted out in embarrassment.

Rolling off onto the bed, the not quite Doctor let out a small, girlish giggle. " It's ok, but may I ask how exactly I ended up on your lap in the first place? " He felt a trace of a blush rising up his face.

Ten pulled at his left ear lobe nervously. " You … well you climbed onto me in the night. "

" I What… I'm so sorry." He felt his light blush turn into a fully blown, red hot burning flush. " You could have pushed me off you know. "

Ten chuckled softly. " It looked like you were having a pretty bad nightmare. I would have felt cruel by pushing you off, you looked like you needed the comfort. " This only made The not quite Doctor blush even harder. " There's no need to be embarrassed. We all get them. Partly the reason why I don't sleep much. Napping is about as far as I usually go. " Ten reached out to the bashful man but Eleven point two flinched away from him.

" Yes me neither. I was just extremely tired last night after all that happened to me. " The not quite Doctor blinked away hushed tears and looked deep into Ten's eyes knowingly. They shared the same guilt, the same pain, the same loneliness. Why couldn't life just be simple? Blimey he needed to get out of here and fast.

" Yes about that…how did you get on my TARDIS in the first place?" Ten raised an eyebrow quizzically .

" I erm. " Oh blimey what was he to say? He couldn't exactly say, hello I'm your future ganger nor could he even hint that he knew what the TARDIS was… okay if all comes to worst just play dumb. " Dunno. All a bit of a whirlwind. Everything happened so fast. So what's a TARDIS?"

Ten grinned madly. " It's not a TARDIS it's the TARDIS. The one and the only left in the entire universe." His eyes darkened slightly but he carried on despite reliving memories of the fields of Gallifrey with bright red grass, and TARDIS' growing as far as the eye could see. " It stands for time and relative dimension in space. This is a time machine and I am a Timelord." Ten stopped as he heard Eleven point two's stomach growl in protest. " Oh silly me! Just rambling on when you must be starving. "

Now come to mention it, the not quite Doctor was ravenous. His empty stomach hadn't had a thing put into it since he was created and it was most certainly not happy about not being attended to. It wouldn't do any harm to stay for a couple more hours just to eat would it? " Yes. " He nodded vigorously.

" Well what would you like? " Ten asked politely.

" Fish fingers and custard!" The not quite Doctor yelled excitedly and bounced off the bed and onto his feet, but as he did so he felt his legs go all wobbly like jelly underneath him and his head throbbed from getting up too fast.

Seeing what was about to happen Ten also leapt to his feet and rushed to Eleven point two's side."Steady." He commanded and held the man still.

Once the blood racing in his head stopped pounding, the not quite Doctor took a careful step away from Ten. " I'm fine, probably just got up to fast that's all."

Ten watched the unstable looking man with eagle hawk eyes , arms stretched out to catch him if he were to fall. " Are you sure? "

" Yes, yes. I'm fine see. " The not quite Doctor started jumping up and down.

" Good. So did you really want fish fingers and custard or did you hit your noggin too hard on the floor last night. " He rapped lightly on the mans forehead and smiled goofily.

" Yes more than anything! It's my favourite dish you know!" ( Another mans favourite food aquired through genetical tranfer of biological traits) he added mentally.

" Right I'll go fetch some." Ten looked at him, face screwed up in disgust. " Why don't you go get dressed. Your clothes are in a pretty bad shape."

The not quite Doctor checked out his appearance, and gasped in shock horror at his scorched and ruined clothes. " Awww this was my favorite outfit. " He pouted.

Ten rolled his eyes at the mans childish behaviour. " First door on your left, there's a wardrobe full to the brim with all sorts of clothes, I'm sure you'll find something to wear.

" Thanks." He didn't really need directions, he remembered the old girls layout like the back of his hands.

As Ten walked out the room to go get some fish custard, the not quite Doctor sighed in relief. He was thankful he could be alone to have a bit of space to think about what he was going to do next. He let himself wonder left down the corridor and into the humungous wardrobe. Perhaps he needed a bit of a change in appearance anyway … He flitted through the jungle of clothes, tossing away things he disliked and chucking things he did like onto his shoulder. " Out with the old and in with the new! … I need, I need, I know what I need. Ahah. " He cried out in joy as he came across some unused black all star sneakers in his exact size that he needed them in. He quickly tore off his old clothes and slipped on the new ones, before staring into one of the rooms many mirrors in satisfaction. He span round in shock as he heard a low whistle behind him.

" Suits you. " Ten nodded in approval at the now slightly less odd looking man. Eleven point two had chosen a tight blue checkerd top that showed his muscles rippling underneath the surface, some nice denim jeans that fitted nicely and showed the mans thin waistline, and some black all star sneakers that complimented the rest of the outfit nicely.

" Do you think so? I dunno, it just doesn't seem well.. Very me."

" It's a change, a good change. You should definatly keep it. " Ten said with a cheeky grin . "Breakfasts ready by the way. "

" Fish fingers and custard? "

" Yup. " Ten popped the p.

" Yey! Show the way to the kitchen. " The not quite doctor clapped his hands excitedly.

**PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW XXX**


	4. Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER: DOCTOR WHO BELONGS TO THE BBC **

**A/N: A HUGE THANKS GOES TO ANYONE WHO HAS ALERTED/FAVED THIS STORY SO FAR AND TO WANNABE DARKLORD AND THISDAYANDAGE FOR REVIEWING CHAPTER 3 . SORRY FOR THE SLOW UPDATES BUT I'VE JUST BEEN SO STRESSED OUT BECAUSE OF MY GCSE EXAMS AND I'VE BEEN ILL.**

**WARNING: DOCTORWHUMP MULTIPLIED BY TWO **

The Doctor plonked himself down on the chair opposite Eleven point two and started to peel his bright yellow banana, but he just couldn't concentrate on eating, his eyes kept on wondering to the man and his strange choice of food. The man definatly had an extreme eccentric streak in him, perhaps even more so than himself. The way the man talked, acted, ate … was to say the least a little odd. Eleven point two had finished off his fish fingers and was now guzzling the rest of his custard down greedily." I was thinking after you've finished eating, perhaps I should examine you in the TARDIS medical bay. " The Doctor almost jumped out of his skin as, as soon as he had finished his sentence Eleven point two slammed down the glass bowl he had been drinking the custard from forcefully onto the table.

" I really don't see the need… I'm fine." The not quite Doctor stammered, his lips were parted slightly in shock. If Ten examined him then his cover would be blown and who knew what consequences that could bring .

" Nope I insist, you might have done some real damage to yourself. " The Doctor frowned in confusion at the mans strange reaction.

" Honestly I'm fine, I've never felt better! " The not quite Doctor exclaimed, a little snappily. Ten started to chuckle at something. " What's so funny? " He pouted, only creating a fresh batch of laughter to reverberate through Ten's chest. His hearts froze as Ten leant forwards and swept a finger just over his upper lip. His former self smelt so sweet, his aroma was a mixture of the red grass back home, scented candles and peppermint tea . He was so close now that he could practically feel heat radiating off the younger man, hear the blood pulsing in the jugular of the mans throat. His lips were literally inches from Ten's, it was like a magnetizing force was pulling them together. What the hell was he doing? This was The Doctor … he was basically his past self, they shared the same memories. His breathing quickened in anticipation and fear … was he really going to go through with this? To his relief he didn't have to make the decision, Ten did it for him and pulled back, though he couldn't help feel that deep down he was quite disappointed.

" You had a bit of custard on your lip. " The Doctor smirked and sucked the thick, foamy substance of his finger. " Not bad. " He grinned but Eleven point two didn't grin back, he just stared into a blank space scornfully " Are you ok? Have I upset you?" The Doctor asked tentatively.

" Nothing. Can I go home now. " The not quite Doctor felt a part of himself crack as Ten's face dropped and his hazel brown eyes welled with dashed hope. Of course he had no home to go to but it was far better than the truth, it would save them a lot of pain and hurt later along the tracks if he just went.

" I Understand. " The Doctor swallowed and nodded at the clear rejection he had just received from Eleven point two. " Where is home? " He questioned.

" Earth! Where else. " The not quite Doctor retorted in a much harsher tone than he had intended .

" Alright, I was only asking. " The Doctor held up his hands in surrender. What had gotten in to the previously calm and passive man? " I'm still insisting on a full medical scan, just to make sure you're in tip top shape, ok."

" Why?" Squeaked the not quite Doctor.

" Just to put my mind at rest, then I'll pop you back to Earth . You clearly don't want to stick around here. " The Doctor muttered the last part so quietly under his breath he was sure that Eleven point two wouldn't hear it.

But the not quite Doctor did hear… that longing in Ten's voice tore yet another huge chunk out of his hearts. " I'm sorry." He reached out a hand to Ten's but then quickly retreated, thinking better of it.

" For what?" The Doctor's forehead creased in confusion.

" That I snapped at you. " The not quite Doctor sighed.

" It's fine, really it's okay." The Doctor assured the man. There was definatly something wrong with the man, just the pain that was present in his eyes, it was like he was carrying the whole universe on his shoulders, like the pressure was crushing him from the inside out.

" It's not that I don't want to be here, I do but it's just completely impossible." The not quite Doctor sighed deeply once more.

The Doctor raised an eyebrow, questioning what Eleven point two meant. " Of course, you have a life back on Earth, family, friends. You don't want to leave that "

" No I have none of those things really." The not quite Doctor contemplated … no friends, no life and definatly no family. He closed his eyes and squeezed the rim of his nose as he tried to shake the image of Amy glaring at him odiously, with such pure hatred, like he was an abomination.

" Then why not stay and travel with me for a bit. Did I mention this is a time machine. Come on any time and any place , Different planets! " The Doctor cried out excitedly, trying to produce even the smallest of smiles from the now seemingly depressed man.

The not quite Doctor bit his lip so hard he could taste blood swirling in his mouth. " I really can't." He eventually stated.

" Ok, well lets get you checked out, the earlier you do that, the faster you can leave. " The Doctor whispered icily and got up from his chair.

The not quite Doctor gulped. " Ok." He got up shakily to his feet, there was no way getting out of this, Ten was too stubborn to take no for an answer. With each step towards the medical bay his dual heartbeats increased, he tried willing them to slow, they'd only give him away faster.

" Wait in there, I'll just go type in the coordinates. " The Doctor cocked his head slightly. " You never said, where and when do you live on Earth?"

" Erm here and there. Oooh drop me off in France nineteenth century ! The French do love a good party !" The not quite Doctor exclaimed.

" Ok France nineteenth century it is then." The Doctor clapped his hands and rubbed them together, this could be his chance to show off, perhaps he could even convince Eleven point two to stay with him for a while.

The not quite Doctor exhaled and felt himself slump as his cool and calm façade washed away. A warm, salty tear escaped his eye and slipped down his cheek, and a number of small sobs made it up his throat. " Oh old girl, what do I do now? " He started to bang his head repeatedly against the TARDIS medical bay wall, he got a small groan of protest in response. He slowly turned round as out of the very corner of his eyes, through the haze of his tears, he saw something. He blinked in surprise at the little white packet in front of him … It wasn't the packet it self that surprised him but the small writing that was printed on it. His eyes surveyed it, taking in each letter and forming it into the same word time and time again, The letters spelt out 'aspirin'. " I wonder where this came from." He mumbled under his breath as he picked up the tiny white packet. The original Doctor never kept aspirin on the TARDIS, it was a dangerous substance for Timelords and whenever his companions were sick he'd use far more advanced medicines that the simple white pills he was holding so where had they come from? A small hum from the TARDIS informed him on exactly how they had gotten there, she was giving him choices, leave the TARDIS and live a lonely life on Earth , stay with The Doctor and pay for the consequences or to end his life. Could he do it? Was this real or was his want to end his life so great that he was just imagining things.

The TARDIS hummed again, whispering kind things into his mind, telling him all she wanted was for him to be happy even if that meant loosing him. "Thank you." He croaked. He began to tear at the packet and clumsily thumbled to get a tablet out … perhaps he should take two just in case. He slowly placed two white pills on the tip of his tongue, letting them loll there for a while. He closed his eyes, there was no going back if he did this, there'd be no regeneration, his life would end. My life was heading for this from the moment I was created from a pile of gloop he thought as he finally let the tablets flow down his throat. At first everything felt normal, nothing was happening but as the sound of footsteps hit his eardrums he was thrown into a world of chaos. Each breath he now took was more shallow than the previous, his heart rates were slowing and his legs could no longer withstand his weight so he collapsed onto the floor in a heap. Fire was coursing through his veins, it felt like his insides were being squeezed and crushed, and his skin prickled with the sensation of a thousand needles jabbing into him, his eyes began to glaze over and everything turned a dull colour of grey. The sound of quickening footsteps were soon drowned out by the gushing of blood and the pounding in his head. Something cold touched him and he kicked out at whatever it was, but whatever was touching him didn't retreat so he kicked out again and let a scream escape his lips. Suddenly he was being reeled upwards, it almost felt like he was flying. As he sank into the darkness he was met with a rush of emotions; relief, sadness, pain, sorrow.

" Shh now. " The Doctor whispered as he placed the screaming man onto the medical bay table. He quickly got to work in figuring out what was going on with the man, he'd only left him alone for five minutes… how had he gotten into this state in such little time? " Come on think, think, think." He yelled and slapped his hand against his forehead to try and get his thoughts moving. " Ahha!" He shouted as he picked up the opened white packet that he had earlier not noticed. " Aspirin." He mumbled in confusion. Perhaps the man was having an allergic reaction to the tablets, yes that made sense. The Doctor began to scan Eleven point two but got far more than he had bargained for ." No can't be!" He gasped in shock at the information on the scanner. He quickly pulled out his stethoscope from his jacket, and placed the two ends in his ears whilst letting the cold metal rest lightly on Eleven point two's chest. The faint heartbeat pulsed lightly, hardly working at all now, he slided the metal to the other side of the mans chest and groaned at another fast fading heart beat. " Timelord." He uttered huskily.

**I WOULD BE EVER SO GRATEFUL IF YOU LEFT A REVIEW XXX**


	5. Chapter 5

**DISCLAIMER: DOCTOR WHO BELONGS TO THE BBC**

**A/N: NOPE I HAVEN'T DROPPED OFF THE FACE OF THE PLANET, LIFE'S JUST BEEN HECTIC . I BREAK UP FROM SCHOOL THIS COMING FRIDAY FOR TWO WHOLE WEEKS SO I SHALL BE UPDATING FAR MORE REGULARLY. THANKS FOR ALL THE SUPPORT WITH THIS STORY SO FAR, I HOPE YOU'RE NOT PUT OFF BY THE INFREQUENT UPDATES. **

**WARNING: A LITTLE BIT OF DOCTOR/ GANGER DOCTOR SNOGING ; ) **

The not quite Doctor felt the clutch of death release him, his soul leapt into his flesh body and he jerked upwards gasping for air, like a fish out of water. His hearts were beating rapidly, his lungs struggling to cope with the sudden intake of air, he was clinging on the very edge of life itself. He felt cold hands force him back down. " Easy does it. " A velvety voice washed over him. He groaned as he realised that Ten hadn't let him die, hadn't let him escape.

" Why?" The not quite Doctor whispered under his breath. He could see the face of Ten just out of the corner of his eyes, frowning, eyes dark with thought.

" Why what?" The Doctor pulled on his ear lobe anxiously.

" Couldn't you just let me die." The not quite Doctor growled. Ten's face dropped, mouth trembling slightly, eyes filled to the brim with raw emotion.

"I suppose I'm selfish. " The Doctor replied.

The not quite Doctors brow furrowed. " Meaning?" He croaked.

The Doctor stepped forwards, and swallowing deeply placed his hands on either side of Eleven point two's chest. Wordlessly he moved one of his hands, and placed his fingertips ever so lightly on the sides of his head.

The not quite Doctor flinched as he felt for the first time in a very long time another Timelord presence reaching out to him, calling him, inviting him in. " How long have you known?" He exhaled.

The Doctor pulled away. " I found out when I was busy saving your life." He snapped.

The not quite Doctor pulled himself up into a sitting position and shuffled over, patting the bed in a gesture for Ten to come and lie by him. " I suppose you want an explanation." He sighed.

" You could say that yeh." The Doctor hopped up beside Eleven point two.

" Look at me. Who am I ?" The not quite Doctor peered directly into Ten's huge, inquisitive eyes.

" You tell me." The Doctor shrugged.

" Look at me, I mean really look." The not quite Doctor pleaded.

The Doctor stared at Eleven point two, long and hard, his eyes widened as he recognised the guilt ridden look within the mans green eyes, the same look that he would often see in his own eyes when he looked in a mirror. " Oh." He mouthed in realisation. Suddenly a lot of things made sense.

The not quite Doctor waited for the yelling to begin, for the lecture about foreknowledge and paradoxes, but it never came. What he hadn't been expecting was The Doctor enveloping him in a warm hug, and squeezing him so tightly that it almost became unbearable. " Hello Doctor." Ten whispered into his ear.

The not quite doctor shook his head, and took a deep, shaky breath. " Don't call me that." He realised to his embarrassment that he was crying, his tears falling onto Ten's shoulder, dampening the soft material of his brown trench coat.

" Hey, hey. It's all right." The Doctor hushed as he stroked his future self's hair.

" I'm not him. I was him. But I can't be anymore." The not quite Doctor whimpered.

The Doctor drew back, confused. " What's that supposed to mean?" He noticed how his future self was trembling uncontrollably, his muscles rippling beneath the surface of his shirt.

The not quite Doctor closed his eyes, and letting out a sigh he said, " I'm a clone if you like, a copy made out of bonded flesh. I have all of his… your memories but I shall never be able to rise to the challenge of being The Doctor. "

The Doctor let out an involuntary chuckle as he realised why the version of himself had insisted on his name being …" Eleven point two" He shouted excitedly. The man he was cradling nodded. In a more serious tone he asked. " And what makes you think you can't be The Doctor anymore?"

" Because in the words of a fairy tale girl, my Amelia pond. " The not quite Doctor took a moment to catch his breath. " I'm not The Doctor anymore, I'm the ' not quite Doctor'."

The Doctor grimaced at the clear pain that was still raw within the mans voice. " You loved her didn't you." It wasn't a question more of a statement.

"Not in the sense of love you're thinking of. She was my best friend, I could tell her everything and I truly cared for her. I guess when she said the things she said, it just kind of hit me hard."

The Doctor nodded in understanding. " She sounds like she was something really special. "

The not quite Doctor let a smile grace across his face. " That she was. She still is. She will be"

Grinning from ear to ear , " But she was completely wrong, you know." The Doctor stated.

The not quite Doctor asked, " About what?"

" You're still very much The Doctor. nothing can or ever will change that." The Doctor wiped a thumb down his future self's cheek, drying them. He asked, " Can I try something out? Specifically for scientific purposes of course." He clarified.

The not quite Doctor nodded, and had hardly enough time to ask what Ten wanted to try out because he was highly distracted by soft lips caressing his own. Wide eyed, and in shock he stayed motionless, unsure whether to react or not. Ten's lips were working slowly and tenderly against his and his tongue was flicking gently, and encouragingly against his mouth, asking for entrance. Slowly the not quite Doctor parted his lips and began to respond. It was a strange feeling, kissing yourself. It wasn't like when Amy had kissed him, that had been completely forced and not at all passionate . Nor had it been like the kiss he had shared with River. This kiss seemed far more familiar and to not think of a better word, the kiss was nice. Though River had been an awfully good kisser, he'd felt a part of himself reignite at her touch, like she had thrown a spark into his heart and a part of him that had been dead had been revived. He suddenly felt very guilty and was hit by another wave of sadness. He immediately broke away. " River." He whispered breathlessly. River was yet another person that he'd lost, another person that probably hated him.

" I'm sorry. What did you say?" The Doctor asked.

" Nothing. So what did you learn from your scientific experiment?" The not quite Doctor queried, only too glad to steer as far away from the subject of River.

The Doctor grinned dopily. " That I'm an extremely good kisser."

**SORRY I JUST COULDN'T HELP MYSELF… I LOVE A BIT OF DOCTOR/DOCTOR FLUFF. ;) **

**I WAS THINKING THAT MAYBE I COULD INCLUDE RIVER IN THE NEXT CHAPPY. WHAT DO YOU THINK? **

**I WOULD BE GRATEFUL FOR ANY TYPE OF FEEDBACK. I LOVE TO HEAR WHAT READERS THINK. DON'T BE FRIGHTENED TO GIVE ME CRITICISM, BUT PLEASE NO FLAMING. **

**, AND PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CHECK OUT MY OTHER FICLETS. **


	6. Chapter 6

**DISCLAIMER: DOCTOR WHO BELONGS TO THE BBC**

**A/N: A HUGE THANKS GOES TO THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE REVIEWED/FAVED/ALERTED.**

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><p>The not quite Doctor stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror, he looked like hell. His hair seemed even more mussed up than normal, the brown mop stuck out at all sorts of odd directions and there were knots starting to form within the wild mass of hair. Dark rings were forming under his eyes from a general lack of sleep and his lips were dried and cracked from not drinking nearly as much as he should have been. He was starting to grow a stubble, casting a shadow on his youthful face, and causing his forest green eyes to reveal the truth of his age.<p>

He wondered to himself how long he had been hiding in the bathroom, and how long it would take for his tenth self to find him.

Ok so the truth was he was avoiding his tenth self … He'd even gone as far as ordering the TARDIS to rearrange the rooms every time his tenth self neared his hiding spot.

He wasn't sure why, perhaps it was the logical voice within himself telling him that he had to get away from his past self, get away from this place that he didn't belong in. However he couldn't help but wonder if it was because of the kiss he had shared with his tenth self. He turned the silver tap on the sink, releasing a gush of water, he splashed the cooling water onto his skin as he relived the kiss over and over again. Those soft lips … the taste he left behind inside his mouth. For a moment he had felt wanted, loved and he had for a tiny second believed his past selves words about him still being The Doctor. Though that was before doubt had started to creep into his mind and the more he thought about it, the faster the doubt consumed him. Was he really worthy of the title that his original self had worked so hard to gain or should he just become an ordinary guy called John Smith, living an ordinary life on the slow path. He found himself trembling, tremor after tremor making it's way up from his long legs to his arms which were now gripping on to the sink so tightly that his knuckles were turning paper white. What was wrong with him? He might not be The Doctor anymore but that didn't mean he had to become an emotional wreck, did it ?

The Doctor almost stopped breathing, his eyes widened, his forest green eyes turned two shades darker in fear. He wasn't alone in the bathroom, there was someone with him, standing behind him, he could sense it. Glancing back up at the mirror he was expecting to see his tenth self fuming, his dark chocolate eyes glaring at him like two black holes of pain and fury. Instead he lay eyes upon…

" River?" He croaked, and with a great deal of effort he managed to turn his head to face her.

There she stood, as beautiful and radiant as she always was when he met her. Her usual unruly Golden locks were tied up into a bun, her skin radiated with a healthy natural glow and her full lips were coated in a glossy red lipstick. She was wearing a long, graceful cream coloured dress that flowed out from behind her and really showed off her curves, his hearts raced at the sight of the gorgeous, enigmatic woman. She was looking at him with her huge golden flecked eyes, he had often contemplated about those eyes. There were so many layers to them, the longer he stared at them, the more emotion he could perceive. Currently they held worry, concern and something else that he just couldn't depict. She didn't say anything, she didn't bat her eyelashes nor did she come out with the usual flirtatious ' hello sweetie.' " River" He tried again, this time far more confidently.

She took a step towards him, and silently stood inches away from him. Each movement she made was precise and bold, reminding him of a cat slowly circling it's prey. He was the prey. She tilted her head and smiled warmly. " Oh my love, he said that it was bad but I could never have imagined…" She trailed of sorrowfully.

" He? " The not quite Doctor questioned.

River frowned. " Your original self "

The not quite Doctors mouth swung agape. " What?" He squeaked.

River laughed lightly before returning to her previous concerned self. " He sent you me. " She again smiled, this time though it was if she was reliving a fond memory.

" Don't be preposterous River, he would do no such thing." The not quite Doctor stomped his foot childishly. How the hell was River here? Shouldn't she be gallivanting around with his Eleventh self? Wouldn't this just mess up timelines even more? He groaned inwardly, things had just taken a huge leap up from complicated.

" Oh Sweetie, I do love it when you go all baby faced on me." She giggled, the most alluring sound that he had ever had the pleasure to hear. She was pushing herself right up against him now, her nose caressing his. She had finally caught her prey.

" River, You can't do this!" The Doctor exclaimed, wriggling uncomfortably beneath her in an attempt to escape. " Who knows what repercussions this could have. You have to get back to the real Doctor, or Stormcage … " He watched as River physically flinched at the word Stormcage, obviously the subject was painful for her. He often found himself pondering how a woman so angelic as River could have ended up in a place such as Stormcage for murder at that. He or rather his original self had met a lot of murderess and that was why it puzzled him so, he could tell that River was no murderer.

" Real Doctor?" Rivers voice was filled with a understanding anguish. " You really don't believe that you're him?" His stony expression gave her all the answers that she needed. " Oh you ridiculous idiot!" She kissed him lightly on the head, a gesture that he greatly appreciated. " No matter what form you are in, you will always be The Doctor to the universe, and you'll always be my Doctor. No matter what. Have you got that you pompous fool? " Shocked into silence he simply nodded." Now if you let me explain myself without being interrupted. " She said sternly. " I'll tell you exactly how I can be here without ripping a huge hole in the universe. No interruptions. Agreed? " She raised an eyebrow sexily, his pulse quickened and he gulped.

" Ok." He agreed.

" As I said I was sent by your original self, as a gift. He said that he didn't want you to be lonely" She looked him up and down, shaking her head in disapproval at his dishevelled appearance. " He said that when you're alone that you don't look after yourself properly, that you get … down." At that point he pulled a face. " That's how he put it." River held up her hands in surrender. Tears started welling in her eyes. " He said that you tried to end your life." His hearts thudded painfully within his chest. Despite not really knowing who River was it still pained him to see her upset. As soon as a single tear escaped and rolled down her cheek he found himself with an armful of River, hugging her tightly against him.

" Shhh it's ok. River, I'm fine look." He cupped her chin with his hand, forcing her to make eye contact with him.

She sighed and shook her head. " You call this okay?" Now it was her turn to grab hold of his chin, she turned his head towards the mirror. The not quite Doctor blushed a bright crimson colour.

" River I …" His bottom lip trembled, she was right, he really wasn't ok.

River placed a finger on his lips. " Shall I continue?"

" Yes, please do." He exhaled, wanting to get to the bottom of things.

" I said to your original self that I wish that I could show you that you are just as loved as him. He said that perhaps that could be arranged … he came up with a plan. You just never give up on people do you, not even yourself." She smirked and he couldn't help but let a small smile tug at the corners of his mouth. " He made another me… I am a ganger. " The last part of the sentence came out as an almost whisper, as if she was slightly ashamed.

" Oh. " He mouthed, unsure of what to say or what to do.

" So Doctor, am I like you?" She questioned.

" Like me? River you're not making much sense. " He grinned at her cross expression and half expected her to slap him. She seemed to be able to refrain herself however, Part of him was slightly disappointed to that fact.

" Am I not River? Am I nothing more than a clone?" His eyes widened.

" Of course you're River! Why would you say that about yourself?" And then realisation hit him like a ton of bricks.

" Penny in the air. " River beamed.

" Oh, I see." He mumbled under his breath.

" And the penny drops. " River sighed in satisfaction.

" River." He let his head sink onto her shoulder.

" Hmmm." She hummed happily, like a cat that had just got the cream.

" Thank you." He nuzzled her slightly, basking in the warmth of her body, her body that seemed to be perfectly moulded to fit against his. Perhaps being The Doctor wasn't such a bad thing after all.

BANG!

Both The Doctor ( As he now called himself since River had talked some sense into him) and River jumped from their gathered positions, startled by the loud noise.

There stood his tenth self, on top of the now broken door, breathing heavily, a small frown scratched into his features.

River eyed his tenth self appreciatively. " Hello pretty boy."

" What!" His tenth self shook his head. " What!" He repeated.

River strolled over to the tenth Doctor and tickled his chin lightly with the tip of her finger, as if she was praising a small puppy.

" WHAT!" His tenth self yelled.

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><p><strong>THIS CHAPTER WAS SO MUCH FUN TO WRITE, I HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT. I WAS THINKING ABOUT WHERE TO GO FROM NOW. SHOULD GANGER RIVER AND GANGER DOCTOR TRAVEL WITH THE TENTH DOCTOR FOR A WHILE OR SHOULD I WRITE ABOUT HOW THEY SETTLE DOWN ON EARTH TOGETHER AND DO LOADS OF HUMANY- WUMANY STUFF (OF COURSE TEN WOULD STILL MAKE APPEARANCES) . YOU AS THE READERS GET TO DECIDE. LEAVE SUGGESTIONS, THOUGHTS AND IDEAS IN A REVIEW. <strong>

**IF YOU LIKE THIS STORY YOU MAY LIKE MY OTHER FANFICS. CHECK THEM OUT ON MY PROFILE PAGE. I WRITE FOR MAINLY DOCTOR WHO FANFICTIONS BUT I HAVE DELVED INTO THE WORLD OF TORCHWOOD A TINY INCY BIT. **

**HAVE A GREAT DAY/NIGHT (DEPENDIND ON WHAT TIME YOU'RE READING THIS.)**

**INVISIBLEBLADE XXX **


	7. Chapter 7

**DISCLAIMER: DOCTOR WHO BELONGS TO THE BBC. **

**A/N: A HUGE THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO HAS REVIEWED/ALERTED/FAVED THIS STORY .. YOUR SUPPORT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME. I'M ON STUDY LEAVE NOW AND I DON'T HAVE TO GO IN TO SCHOOL FOR AN EXAM UNTIL WEDNESDAY SOOO THAT HOPEFULLY MEANS MORE FREQUENT FAN FICTION UPDATES FROM ME. ANYWAY, HOPE YOU ENJOY. **

**JUST IN CASE YOU DIDN'T ALREADY KNOW THIS TAKES PLACE JUST AFTER THE WATER OF MARS EASTER SPECIAL FOR THE TENTH DOCTOR. OBVIOUSLY AFTER THE FLESH EPISODES FOR THE ELEVENTH DOCTORS' GANGER. AS FOR RIVERS GANGER, I IMAGINE THAT SHE CAME FROM WAY, WAY IN THE FUTURE WHEN SHE IS THE DOCTORS WIFE.**

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><p>" Ah River, I can explain. " The Doctor stuttered as he watched his tenth self fall further, and further into the same confusion, and utter bewilderment that River always left him with.<p>

" No need my love. " River turned to face him, her eyes dancing with life and joyfulness. " I was pre-warned that your younger self would be here." She threw a sly smile in his tenth selves direction.

" I don't understand." His tenth self said, wide eyed. Reaching inside his brown trench coat he plucked out his sonic screwdriver, and started scanning her. He frowned and shook his head before placing the metallic device back within his bigger on the inside pockets. Pushing a hand through his brown hair, causing it to stick up even more than it usually did, he finally spoke, " Hello, Professor song." A sad smile graced his tenth selves face. The Doctor could immediately tell what he was thinking of. The library. The day that River Song had sacrificed herself so that thousands of others could carry on living. The day that he had ran with River for the very first time. The day that River had ran for the very last time.

" I always love it when you call me professor, sweetie." River purred seductively. The Doctor felt his hearts speed up and could tell that his tenth self was feeling just as flustered as he was. The way that River talked about him made him want to forget about the rules of the time and space continuum , made him want to shake the truth out of her. What was he to her? River had know his name back in the library? There was only one reason that he would tell anyone about his name, and that caused the memory of her death to hurt even more, knowing that one day she would mean everything to him. Even though now it wouldn't be him loosing her directly, as it would be infact be his original self loosing the original River it still hurt all the same, unless… no that was something he didn't really want to even think about. He stared at Rivers ganger curiously. Could it have been this River that died in the library. His hearts sunk within his chest like two heavy stones weighing him down. He gulped, pushing the devastating thought from his mind.

His tenth self was looking directly at him now, understanding compassion swirling in his pools of chocolate brown. The Doctor quickly looked away, the memory of their shared kiss still heavy in his mind.

River looked at him then back at his tenth self. " Ok, is there something I'm missing? " She asked, waggling her eyebrow quizzically.

" Nope." His tenth self replied, popping the p for emphasise.

" Certainly not River. " The Doctor spluttered when she turned to him with an unnerving glare.

" Boys, I think that I've known you long enough to know when you're hiding something from me." River retorted in a stern voice.

His tenth self stared down at his plimsolls guiltily and swallowed down hard. " Nope, like I said." He mumbled under his breath.

" Sweeties, please just tell me" River sighed, exasperated.

" River, does it even matter?" The Doctor asked in his high pitched voice that seemed to always give his lying away, especially to her.

" you're a terrible liar." The Doctor felt a strike to the hearts. The last person that had said that to him had been a certain Mrs Pond.

River immediately caught on to his mood and walked up to him, taking his hand gently in hers she said, " It's all right. You don't have to tell me yet."

The Doctor shook his head in amusement and took a big breath. " We kissed. " He exclaimed with gusto.

Rivers mouth trembled as she bit her bottom lip, before bouts of uncontrollable laughter escaped her lips. " you kissed yourself. " She choked on her hysteria.

The Doctor rubbed the back of his head. " Yes, well I don't see what's so funny about that fact. " He whined.

River glanced up at his tenth self and almost collapsed onto the floor as a fresh batch of laughter clambered up her throat and out.

" Steady. " The Doctor yelped as he yet again found himself with a squirming armful of River.

" Oh my hero." She giggled before suddenly looking rather downcast.

" River what's wrong?" The Doctor asked worriedly.

" I just feel rather jealous. " She pouted.

" Jealous?" He asked confused. " Jealous of what exactly? "

" That you kissed your past self, but I've been told that I can't kiss you yet. " Again she looked incredibly sad.

" What?" He squeaked.

" Your original self said that you are too young, that you don't really know who I am yet." Her eyes turned stony.

She blinked a few times, seeming to zone out before returning to her normal flirtatious self. " So, was their tongues involved in this kiss."

" There might have been." He said teasingly.

For that smart remark he found himself being punished, River style. His back was slammed against the bathroom wall, she was pinning him against it, refusing to let him escape. Her hands were all over him and her lips were pushing forcibly against his, surely causing them to bruise. Unlike the first time that he had kissed her he was far more prepared, and although his arms still flailed about momentarily they finally let his hands rest on her hips.

" Ahem. " His tenth self interrupted them, much to both his and Rivers disappointment.

" Sorry to interrupt but what are you doing here River?" He asked, raising his left eyebrow.

" Ah pretty boy, I forgot about you." River grinned from ear to ear. Releasing her grip on The Doctor she waltzed over to his tenth self. " Come with me. I think an adventures in order, don't you?" She grabbed his hand and began pulling him out the bathroom door. She looked back at The Doctor and shook her head. " Get showered, shaved and for gods sake put a bow- tie back on." She ordered.

The Doctors mouth fell slack, " You've always hated my bow-ties. " He said puzzled.

" Oh I don't know, they can be useful for certain things." River winked and then she and his tenth self were gone.

The Doctor fell back against the bathroom sink in shock. " I hate that woman." He whispered.

" No you don't!" Came a yell from deep inside the TARDIS.

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><p><strong>RIGHT SO I HAVE A FEW IDEAS GOING ROUND MY HEAD FOR THIS STORY. TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK IN A REVIEW IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO HAVE AN INPUT TO THIS STORY. TELL YOU WHAT LEAVE A REVIEW ANYWAY. I LOVE THEM, I CRAVE THEM AND I CAN'T POSSIBLY WRITE MORE WITHOUT THEM.<strong>

**1. GANGER RIVER, GANGER DOCTOR AND THE TENTH DOCTOR GO ON A LOAD OF ADVENTURES.**

**2. THEY PAY RORY AND AMY A VISIT. **

**3. GANGER DOCTOR AND GANGER RIVER LIVE A NORMAL LIFE ON EARTH, MAYBE EVEN HAVING A TINY TIME TOT AND MOST PROBABLY GET MARRIED AGAIN. **

**4 A SORT OF MIX OF ALL THREE OPTIONS ABOVE. **

**5. LEAVE AN IDEA. FOR EXAMPLE IF YOU HAVE A CERTAIN ADVENTURE IDEA OR SOMETHING YOU WISH TO SEE IN THIS STORY. **

**PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CHECK OUT MY OTHER FAN FICTIONS. **

**UNTIL NEXT TIME…**

**INVISIBLEBLADE. XXX**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: A HUGE THANKS GOES TO THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE REVIEWED/FAVED/ALERTED… YOUR SUPPORT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME. **

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><p>The Doctor, now armed with a tardis blue bow-tie, a peacock green jacket and a brand new screwdriver was certainly feeling a lot more like himself, and things were pretty much getting back to normal. As normal as travelling with your past self, as your past selves companion. As normal as travelling the stars with a woman notoriously know for murder. Yes, defiantly normal.<p>

Currently they were running away from impending doom, a group of wild dogs at their heels. Except they weren't wild dogs, they were robots in the shape of dogs. Nasty things, with sharp metal teeth that could quite easily rip you to shreds, and red glowy eyes that sapped red hot lasers at anyone who crossed their path. Ahh yes, this was the life.

" Ha." His tenth self laughed heartily, throwing him a huge, cheesy grin and squeezing his hand slightly.

River who was holding his other hand, rolled her eyes and sighed in exasperation, " And here I was thinking that it was just your Eleventh incarnation who's prone to attracting danger."

" Nope I'm afraid that all of me tend to do that." The Doctor replied simultaneously with his tenth self, causing the both of them to rocket off into hysterical laughter.

River smirked, batting her eyelashes flirtatiously, " I wonder what else all of you tend to do." This comment made The Doctor blush, and his tenth selves jaw drop. " Close that mouth pretty boy, you don't want to catch flies." She giggled.

His tenth self swallowed, brushed his free hand through his spiked up hair and closed his mouth. The Doctor knew just how flabbergasted his tenth self was when it came to the mysterious River Song. He himself was still taken aback by how familiar River was with him. Who was she? What was she going to mean to the original Doctor? What was her clone going to mean to him? He already felt quite besotted with her and couldn't imagine life without her. He'd even go as far as saying that a small part of him was beginning to love her. This was most certainly bad! Falling in love never ended well for him. In the end he always lost them, they always break his hearts. This River very well not be the same woman that his tenth self had seen die, but she'd still leave him one way or another. She was oh so human, she'd only age in front of him, withering away into nothing. That's if she's even human … he's not sure. She seems human but he supposes to the naked eye so does he.

Suddenly the questions in his head don't matter anymore as yet more robot dogs corner the three of them from the opposite direction. Growling mechanically, steam puffing from their nostrils, eyes burning brightly. " Ah. " Was all his tenth self could say.

" Mmmm, My sentiments exactly." The Doctor muttered in agreement as his eyes searched frantically for an escape route. However he found none, they were well and truly trapped.

River sighed heavily and let go of his hand, " Do I have to do everything around here?" She reached across her thigh and swooped out the gun that seemingly never left her side.

" River, guns don't solve anything. " His tenth self said disapprovingly, placing his hand on the gun and shaking his head.

" Do you have any other suggestions?" She raised her left eyebrow.

" At the minute no." His tenth self stared dumbfounded at his plimsolls.

" Well then I suppose we don't have any choice. That is if you don't want to die a horrific death by laser. You don't, do you?" She gave him a withering look.

His tenth self huffed, " I suppose not."

" River I don't care what you do, just do it now … they don't exactly look friendly. " The Doctor squeaked, taking a step backwards.

River grinned, " You're so much easier old. " She stated before swerving around at the speed of light, shooting bolts of electric at the robot dogs. The Doctor watched in fascination as each robotic canine fell to the ground with a loud clang. He had to admit a huge part of him liked River because of her accurate shot. There was something almost … sexy about it. He shook his head and looked up at his tenth self who seemed almost in a state of shock. River swirled round for one last time, blew the smoke that was puffing off of the but of the gun, twirled the gun and placed it safely back in her holster.

" Impressed?" She questioned. Who the question was aimed at the Doctor wasn't quite sure.

" Erm, yes, very. " He mumbled.

His tenth self groaned, " All right, maybe a little." He reluctantly said, pulling at his ear slightly.

A loud growl reverberated from behind the three time travellers and suddenly time seemed to slow down. The Doctors hearts almost stopped within his chest as he watched Rivers body slump forwards with the weight of the metal dog. His eyes widened and breath quickened as the robot dog shredded the back of Rivers shirt and the first drops of blood began to flow. His tenth self was about as useful as he, just standing there like a stuffed dummy. He couldn't take it anymore, he had to do something and quickly. Reaching inside his pocket he brought out his new screwdriver and pointed at the monster that was making quick work of mauling River. He pressed the button and a sharp, high pitched noise was emitted causing the vile metal creature to reel backwards, screeching. The Doctor upped the frequency and watched in satisfaction as the creature exploded into a thousand chunks of metal. He raced to Rivers side and placed his hand over her wounds, attempting to stop the now free flowing crimson liquid from escaping further. " Help me. Just help me." He pleaded, looking into his tenth selves pain filled choclate pools.

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><p><strong>I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE ANGST X <strong>

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**SO I'VE DECIDED THAT IN THIS FIC I'LL JUST BE DOING A FEW MORE ADVENTURES. HOWEVER I'M GOING AT SOME POINT TO WRITE A SEQUEL FOR THOSE WHO WANTED GANGER RIVER/GANGER DOCTOR TO SETTLE DOWN AND MEET AMY AND RORY. YEH, JUST SEEMED EASIER THAN DOING BOTH IN THE SAME FIC. **

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	9. Chapter 9

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own.**

**Welcome readers,**

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**Enjoy x**

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><p>The Doctor ; the man who heals people. Never had he felt so distanced from his title. River Song was hurt, injured and quite possibly dying, and there was nothing he could do but grip her icy cold hand and hope. He had often seen hope as a useful emotion but now it seemed dismal and completely pointless. As River lay in darkness, so did he, a metaphorical darkness that is.<p>

He felt a hand gently squeeze his shoulder but he didn't look up. He wasn't about to take his eyes of River any time soon.

" She'll be ok, you know. The flesh is healing quite nicely. It's quite fascinating really! With normal DNA it would take months for injuries like hers to heal but by the way it's looking I think she'll be up and about in only a few days. This technology is far too advanced to come from Earth though. Where did you say it was from again?" His Tenth self rambled on with an edge of enthusiasm to his voice.

The Doctor felt his blood start to boil beneath his skin, " She's not some experiment you know." The Doctor hissed under his breath dangerously, " Nor am I for that matter." He glanced up at his tenth self and shook his head, " We're living people, not technology, not objects, living people. " His chest seethed up and down and he waited for the anger to form within his younger selves' eyes, but the anger didn't come. Instead all he sought out was sorrow, a deep sadness, regret, and self loathing.

His tenth self nodded, " I'm sorry, really, I'm so, so sorry." He looked down at his feet shamefully and tugged at his left ear lobe out of nervous habit.

" No, I am. I should have left as soon as I was back up on my feet. " The Doctor muttered to himself. If only he had left, if only the tablets he had taken had kicked in a moment sooner, if only …

River's ganger wouldn't even be here, she wouldn't exist. His hearts twisted together painfully at that thought. River's existence ceasing was a painful thought even if this version of her was a ganger. Ganger River was still painstakingly the same woman he had met in the library, the same woman he had kissed, the same woman he had grown to love.

His tenth self pulled a up a seat and plonked himself beside him, " Who is she?" His question lingered in the air with an excruciating amount of affliction enveloping it.

The Doctor frowned, " I don't know. I thought I knew, I really did, but now I'm not so sure. Now I'm not entirely certain that I want to find out. " His green eyes flashed to his younger self. " It doesn't fade you know." He whispered hoarsely.

" What doesn't? " His tenth self raised his thick, bushy eyebrow.

" The guilt. " The reply was like an arrow throttling into the tense silence. " That guilt that you feel whenever you see her. It doesn't fade. In fact in gets stronger because the more you learn about this beautiful woman, the more you start to realise that… " He bit down on his lower lip until the taste of blood swilled on his taste buds.

" Realise what?" His tenth self asked sincerely. After a few moments of neither of them speaking his tenth self pried again, " Realise what?"

The Doctor stroked a finger along the length of Rivers arm and smiled weakly, " We've lived so long, seen so much, done everything there is to do, been practically everywhere, and yet it all means nothing when compared to her. She is so much … bigger. " He extended his arms above his head to exaggerate his point, " Which means the moment she steps into that library, the second she sacrifices herself, the universe will become simultaneously smaller. This universe will become a graveyard, and we Doctor." He gestured towards himself and his tenth self, " Will become death." Taking a deep breath he continued, " What if this is her? What if this is the River that stands in that library? And even if this isn't her, even if it's the original her. Then my original self will fall into a trap of destruction. This whole universe … it'll just crumble. " Tears poured down his cheeks ungracefully. " What do we do?" He asked the question through his sobs.

His tenth self looped a skinny arm around his side, " We don't do anything. We let things play out the way they're meant to. Besides either way she doesn't die, not completely. Oh boy does she live!"

The Doctor leant his head on his tenth selves shoulder, " I wish I could believe what we offered her was a new chance to live, but I can't. Not that I know what she's really like. I found out she spent most of her life in a prison for murder. " The last word rang out with a clear hint of anger to it.

" Who's murder?" His tenth self questioned, curiosity tinting his words.

" I don't know, and besides it doesn't matter, she's innocent, I can tell, in my heart I know she's innocent. What does matter is that the River that went to that library was given a permanent prison sentence, and that's completely wrong. She should be free, travelling the stars, flirting, shooting Fezzes!"

His tenth self looked on at him, bemused by the latter part of that sentence, " Shooting Fezzes? " He smirked.

The Doctor nodded, " It's a long story . A rather sad ending, well for the fez that is." He chuckled softly. " River Song is going to live. They both are. " He nodded decisively. " Because sometimes, on very rare occasions, everybody lives. "

" Except that's impossible and you know it." His tenth self stated.

" Not impossible just a little bit unlikely. " The Doctor leant down and placed a kiss upon River songs forehead.

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	10. Chapter 10

**DISCLAIMER : I do not own.**

**A/N: A huge thanks goes to everyone who has shown support with this story so far. A little bit of Doctor/Doctor in this chapter. Sorry, just couldn't help myself.**

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><p>He had planned it, carefully, marooning it around a concept so basic and brilliant that it just simply couldn't go wrong. He was going to save River, and there was nothing or no one who could stop him. His mind was set on saving her. He had to stop the sacrifice she had made. He had to stop it, and he would because without a doubt in the depths of his newly knitted DNA he was still The Doctor. His predecessor and River had been right all along, because The Doctor was a man who made decisions, horrific ones, with destructive consequences, and here he was, doing the very same. _ Saving her because she had saved him so many times before.<p>

He doesn't know who that impossible woman is but compared to the thousands of stars in the universe she is the brightest, most beautiful his life is dark her shining light guides him, and he wasn't about to let her burn out and die. The universe would be a far more dismal place if he let that happen.

He was choosing one woman over every other living thing. If he rescued her from the grips of death not only would he be jeopardising the people saved in the library core, but he'd also be putting the whole of existence at risk.

" You can't do this. I'm sorry, I'm really sorry but you just ... can't." His tenth selves voice drifted from behind him like a powerful stab in the back.

Turning around he stared into the deep pitted eyes of his tenth self, and spoke slowly with a grating hint of mild annoyance staining his words, " I have to. You just don't understand, " Taking a deep breath he repeated himself, " I have to do this."

His tenth self frowned, " Why? You know it's wrong. I can see in your face that you know." Oh yes, it was such a funny joke the sick universe was playing on him, wasn't it? The only thing that could possibly hold him back was another version of himself. Typical!

" What's so wrong about saving someone?" He retorted in an automatic response. Though River Song wasn't just a person ... she was so much more.

" Normally I'd agree with you but I can't ... not this time. You'd be crossing your own timeline." His tenth self pushed his hands in his pockets and glanced at the ground sadly.

Chuckling slightly he said, " And what exactly do you call this? " He raised an eyebrow, and poked his tenth self.

His tenth self swallowed, " A valid point, but what if ..."

" Already thought of that! I've analysed all the risks down to a fine art. " He quickly interrupted his tenth self, " I know what I have to do." He straightened his bow tie nervously before starting to type in the coordinates to the library on the TARDIS console.

" I can't stay with you nor can the TARDIS. You'd be on your own, and what about the River on board ...what if she wakes up. What should I tell her? " His tenth self asked.

Of course he knew what his predecessor was doing. He was trying to make him feel guilty about leaving the injured River without so much as a goodbye, but what he was about to do was for River ; at least that's what he kept on telling himself. His hearts felt like they were being torn into tiny shreds. A huge part of him wanted to stay my Rivers bedside, to await the moment she opened her eyes again, but that part of him was rather outweighed by the part that wanted to save her from the library. The image of her burning body just wouldn't leave him alone, and unless he did something quickly that would be an image he would carry around for the rest of his lives.

" Tell her... tell her. " He bit down on his lower lip slightly as he tried to find the right words, " That I've just popped out for a while. I'll be back before she knows it. " He smiled weakly at his tenth self, " I promise you I've thought about this long and hard. I know what I'm doing. Time and space shall stay intact." He span and began walking towards the TARDIS doors. He half expected to be stopped and his fear almost came true as he felt hand clamp onto his wrist.

" It's not time and space that I'm worried about. " His tenth self admitted, leaning forwards.

The Doctor found himself melting underneath the puppy dog eyes that were fixed on him, and instead of pushing his tenth self away he instead brushed his lips against Tens and gave him a simple but ever so affectionate kiss. This was the second kiss that he'd shared with himself, and despite the wrongness of it, both times felt extremely right. except this time it felt like he was saying goodbye, and a small voice in the back of his mind was telling him that there was every chance that he was.

Pulling away the two men stared at each other both knowing exactly what the other was feeling ; Scared, sickened with sorrow, and completely baffled,

" You must really love her. " His tenth self smiled weakly.

The Doctor took a second to think about the mixture of the feelings that River Song stirred up within him, " Yes. I barely know her, but blimey do I love that woman." He nodded.

" Then go out there and save her. Just BE careful!" His tenth self said, emphasising the word be ," Oh, and don't do anything I wouldn't do. Now off you pop before I change my mind. "

The Doctor raked a hand through his thick, brown hair and let out a long, pained sigh, " It was good though, yeh? " He asked.

" It was more than good! It was brilliant. You're brilliant!" His tenth self grinned at him madly.

" Good. Now, look after her for me, and promise me something. Never let go of her hand." And just like that The Doctor found himself running. He fled out of the TARDIS doors and was immediately met by hungry shadows flickering in the dark.

He ran, never stopped, not for anything, and all his previous denial of not being the man who had created him blew away, along with the air in his lungs.

Because he was The Doctor, and what does The Doctor do best? He runs. Except he wasn't running away, not this time.

Each stride he took through the darkness was another step towards saving River, another step closer to the fate that had been waiting for him all this time, because he knew now, this is why he had been created. For this moment in time. This was his purpose.


	11. Chapter 11

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own **

**A/N: A huge thanks goes to everyone who has reviewed/alerted/faved so far. Your support means the world to me.**

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><p>When River awoke she instantly knew that something was amiss. What the something was, she didn't know. A slight pain rippled through her as reality's claws grabbed her and pulled her into the waking world.<p>

A small hum welcomed her, and her mind slid the pieces of the puzzle together slowly, and warily, as though even her own mind was trying to protect her from what was about to come.

A set of dark brown eyes pooled into her soul, and she realizes that it wasn't in fact something that she was missing, but someone. However this someone looming in her vision is missing a vital part of his soul. This someone is too young to even start to comprehend what she feels for him, or what they have been through together, and though the missing part of the persons soul is still incomplete it still filled the slotted place within her heart better than the youthful creature watching over her.

" Hello, pretty boy." She whispered under her breath in a brief greeting.

Her eyes skimmed around the medical bay, " What happened?" She asked, though, mentally she screamed, Where is he?

" You were _ " The tenth Doctor rubbed the back of his head awkwardly, " Attacked. Well I say attacked it was rather more like torn to shreds. He saved you. The 11th Doctor's ganger I mean. Well technically the sonic screwdriver saved you, but we can't let that take all the credit, can we? He was marvellous. I can see why you love him."

River watched attentively as the younger version of The Doctor smiled sadly at her. She immediately felt bad for him. She had heard tales of the lonely angel, and as she looked on at him, she could finally see what those legends meant. His face was stony, his eyes withdrawn and glazed over, and his expression was so devastating that it was beautiful.

She reached across the medical cot and took his hand, " I love The Doctor. You are him, and one day it will be your turn, and you will take his place." She told him firmly.

The Tenth Doctor smiled weakly at her, " I shall wait for that eagerly. " He told her, a little bashful.

" Yes, I imagine you will." She smirked at him, and watched in pleasure as he turned a gorgeous rosy red.

" Now where is the hero of the day?" She questioned him.

He looked away from her, refusing to answer the simplest of questions.

" Pretty boy, tell me, now." She lowered her voice to a deadly tone. She hadn't found a version of The Doctor who could lie to her after she used that voice on them, and this version was no different.

" He's gone. "

The reply was so unexpected that River felt her hearts twinge slightly.

" Gone?" She swallowed down the lump slowly rising within her throat, " Where to?"

The tenth version of The Doctor raised his eyes so they met with hers, and pulled at his ear lobe nervously. She knew straight away that the answer she was about to receive would not be one that she would like.

" Spoilers."

This time her hearts almost erupted in flames. That word sounded dead, and wrong flowing from the lips of such a young version of the man she loved, and worse still, she hadn't been expecting to hear that word ever again.

She and The Doctor were both gangers. They no longer existed in the same back to front time line as there originals did. There was only one more secret that she held from him, and that, as the original version of the Eleventh embodiment of The Doctor had informed her original self, wouldn't stay that way for long. She had become a ganger so she could be with him, and now, he was gone.

The universe was full of confusing things, and you can bet that The Doctor was often at the heart of most of them . This one however was not only confusing, but painful.

She had been there for him, guiding him, and showing him how he was in fact the same man as he always had been, and now he had left her, and although not on purpose, The Doctor had yet again chosen the universe over her. At least it felt that way to her.

Where did she go from here?

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><p>She was completely unaware of his presence. Either that or she was simply ignoring him on purpose. His hearts were pumping loudly within his chest. So loud that he was almost certain that she would be able to hear the aching melody they were playing out into the darkness.<p>

His tenth self-lay slumped on the floor, handcuffed, and unconscious. The Doctor shook his head in amusement. He would never quite understand how River seemingly plucked handcuffs out of nowhere. It was just another mystery that lay behind the mysterious package that was River Song. Perhaps today was the day he would finally be able to open that package and see what truly lay beneath her surface.

" River-Song, stop. " He addressed her firmly, as she began tying herself into the chair.

He shivered as the sense of déjà vu spread across his skin in the form of Goosebumps. Memories raced behind his eyelids. Memories of a time long ago, when he had been an idiot in a pinstriped suit and plimsolls. Where he had witnessed River sit in that chair and die. His blood was pounding in his veins accordingly to the panic the images kindled within him.

The curly haired woman turned in shock and stared at him as though she was staring at a fading ghost.

He shook his head, " I can't let you do this." Walking forwards he took her hands, and placed a small kiss upon her head.

" I'm afraid we don't have a choice." River told him in an icily bitter voice.

The Doctor swallowed, and reached inside his peacock green jacket, pulling out the metallic sonic, before scanning her. He lowered his head, and muttered a few Gallifreyan swears under his breath. This was the same River he left on the TARDIS. No wonder she was angry with him, " How long has it been?" He asked her.

" Too long." River mumbled, " Far too long."

" River, I'm sorry, and I mean truly sorry, but I only left you so I could do this. " He had managed to distract River just long enough to tie himself to the chair.

" What the hell are you doing!" She snapped.

" Saving you." He met her eyes, and smiled wryly at her.

" Don't be ridiculous!" She tried to rip the wires that were now attached to him,

" Don't. " He pleaded, " Let me do this. Do you trust me?"

" With my life." She confirmed, emotion flickering off of her tongue.

" Then let this happen. This must happen." His breathing hitched into a near sob, and a tear travelled down the full length of his face.

" And what about you? How will you survive?" She questioned him, worry churning away at her facial features.

He paused, sighed, and shrugged slightly, " I wouldn't worry about me too much. I'll survive this. I always do." He knew his words offered no comfort to either of them, but in his hearts he hoped that they were right. " River, before I go, I need to know _ Who are you?" His last wish was to know who the woman he was saving was.

" Oh Sweetie, I am so many things." She leant closer to him, tears of her own splashing onto his skin, " But to you _" The word was whispered so faintly within his ear that he thought that for a minute that his hearing was playing tricks on him, but as the light consumed him, and her eyes bore back into his, he knew that she spoke the truth. How hadn't he figured it out before?

River Song was his wife.

The last thing he saw was the shocked expression on the just waking younger version of himself.

Then the end came.

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><p><strong>Please leave a review x <strong>


	12. Chapter 12

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own **

**A/N: A huge thanks goes to my readers**

It was the second time that he had dissolved into the flesh he had been created from, but this time was different. There was no pain, no torture, just a sharp numbness that surrounded him. He was slipping in and out of consciousness, and for one agonizingly long moment he found himself with a lack of control of his entire body. Though His mind was alive, with sparks, and ideas, and thoughts. Something within him had awoken - something important had happened - something big - something very big! If only he could remember - if only he could move - a nice long run would get his brain juices going.

It took him a little longer than he liked to regain his memories. A clouded image of a curly haired woman wriggled into the nitpicks of his ever so slightly sluggish mind. Surely a creature as beautiful, and charming as her must have a name - surely. He squeezed through all of his thoughts, trying to find the answer. It was then that another image struck him. Water : deep blue water. Hmmm this was a clue - a big clue! Rii - River! Ah , Of course!

River Song was the reason lying behind his whole situation. Oh that woman, that wonderful woman. She'd given up so much for him. Her whole childhood! She had even cloned herself because of her love towards him. It had been high time that he had given her something back. That's why he'd gone to the library - to save her - he had wanted to return that love and sacrifice. Still in turn he'd only hurt her further by leaving without a goodbye on the TARDIS with his tenth self . She must have thought that he had abandoned her. That wasn't the case at all! He just hoped that in the very last moments she'd known that.

There was something else too! It was a word, a big word, so big and so happy. It was a gigantic life changing word. How could something so big slip away from him with such ease.

He groaned as he realized he was starting to get the feeling back in his body. It was a dreadful sensation, but it was pleasant in comparison to his previous numbness.

" Doctor?" A voice brushed past his ear. It belonged to a man but it was too low pitched to belong to his tenth self.

The Doctor winced open his eyes, with a great deal of difficulty. He found himself lying on an old sofa with a person that he hadn't seen since his very start in life hovering over him, " Rory Pond!" He squealed, lurching upwards and squeezing the roman until Rory rather awkwardly pushed him away. The Doctor giggled like a little school girl. This was mad, completely barmy even. Not in his wildest dreams had he thought about ever being able to see the Ponds again. Though he hadn't been exactly sure of how they would greet him. He surveyed the room for the missing Pond - Amelia.

" Actually it's Wil - eh never mind." Rory shook his head, and just simply stared at him. In Rory's eyes The Doctor could see many things : Sadness, confusion, joy, fear, " What are you doing here? How did you get here? I mean - you said to Amy - you said you'd never be able to see us again."

The Timelord could only assume that those were the words of the man he'd been cloned from. Sighing he realized just how complicated things were going to get, " Rory, do you remember when we went to that castle - well factory, and those gangers went mad, and well, I suppose, tried to kill us all? " He asked sorrowfully.

" Yeh, why?" Rory questioned.

" Do you remember The Doctor's clone?" He could feel the tremble in his words, his hearts were grinding together, his breath hot and terrified. He was scared of how Rory would react, petrified that he'd once again be an outcast.

" I - uh guess." Rory shrugged, " Why?"

The Doctor didn't answer Rory, he just locked eyes with him, stony faced, hoping that Rory would understand.

It took a while for things to seem to click into place within Rory's mind, but when they did his face dropped, " You're - I mean - you're him."

The Doctor nodded gravely, " I'm sorry." He mumbled, " I'm really rather sorry. I seem to end up in the strangest of places. " Tears burned away in his flaming green pools. No! Too many tears had been shed, too much hurt and pain. He was The Doctor - he'd seen too much and had run much too far.

Without his tenth self, without River even, what was going to become of him? The ponds wouldn't want him. He was far too early for their timeline. He wasn't their Doctor.

" Don't cry." Rory pleaded, " It'll be ok - I think."

The Doctor laughed heartily at Rory's nervous stuttering. Until now he'd forgotten just how much he'd missed the clumsy, big - nosed nurse. He wiped his tears away, " Yeh you're probably right. Could be worse. Well I've got to go - bye, bye Pond." He leapt up to his feet, searched for the way out before heading in that direction.

" Wait! You can't just leave." Rory shouted after him.

The Doctor span around so fast that it took a while for his body to catch up with his neck and head,

"Why?" He asked, " What would Amelia say? " He winced, " I'm sorry Rory. I really don't belong here." He went to leave, but was immediately stopped in his tracks by the green liquid running under his only exit. His eyes widened in wonder.

" What the hell?" Rory also watched the green vat of liquid pooling on the floor. Though he looked more worried than anything.

The Doctor watched as the liquid began to froth and bubble. It was forming a body, not any body though, River's. He couldn't help the huge grin spreading across his features when he lay eyes on River in all her amazing glory.

" You couldn't be more wrong." He breathed in her soothingly smoky voice, strolled over to her, and forgetting it wasn't just he and River in the room, kissed her fully on the lips. It was one of those beautifully rare moments where even to him time stood still. For a long while they were both lost in a whirl of hair, and lips, and soft caresses.

" Blimey! How long have I been away!" A familiar Scottish voice dragged them both from their ecstasy.

" Ah - hello Pond." The Doctor greeted her with a meek smile, blushing furiously with embarrassment .

" How are you here?" She asked him, sounding a little distraught by even being in his presence.

" We're gangers mother. We both are." River explained, lifting some of the heavy weight from The Doctor's shoulder. He twisted his fingers through hers and kissed her lightly on the head in appreciation. It took his brain approximately two minutes to realise what River had just called Amy.

" Mother?!" He squeaked. He looked towards Amy and back to River again, " Mother?!" He exclaimed again in a splutter of confusion.

" It's a long story my love. " River cupped his cheek, trapping the millions of questions he wanted to ask on the very tip of his tongue. He froze in shock, eyes widening, lips trembling furiously with the fear of the unknown. He hated not knowing things!

" Daddy, be a dear and put the kettle on. I believe I have a lot to discuss with my husband." She dragged him over to the sofa.

" Dad?" He shifted his eyes to where Rory was making tea in compliance to River's orders, " Husband?" He closed his eyes firmly shut as he tried to fight off the waves of shock frolicking over him. There was that word again. That big, amazingly complicated word. His eyes sprung open in realisation, " Wife?" He swallowed down hard, " You're my wife - well at least I think you're my wife." He began to shake. This was all a little too much for him. He'd felt many emotions before but the one he was feeling now was unexplainable. It was corrosive, it burned at the centre of his hearts, burned his soul, made him feel so alive, and so real.

River smirked, "Yes."

" Yes?" He giggled, " Yes!"

He lightly brushed his lips against hers, " But wait, there's something else. Rory and Amy are your parents. How? " He looked into the depths of her eyes, and for the first time since he's known her, he sees the truth, the truth that had been lying beneath his nose for all of this time.

" Well sweetie, when a man and a woman love each other very much -" She replied in a rather seductive voice. That voice did things to him that he didn't really quite understand. He rolled his eyes, turned a ruby red for the second time in a row, and looked at the ground sheepishly, " I know that bit." He huffed.

" She was conceived on the TARDIS Doctor." Amy popped into their conversation.

The Doctor blinked in surprise. He can remember hearing some pretty disturbing noises from Amy and Rory's room, but he hadn't thought, not for one second, of the consequences of them. He looked to River for confirmation. She nodded and twisted her fingers further around his own.

" I'm a human plus. Amy and Rory are my parents. The plus is Timelord because I was conceived whilst the TARDIS was still in the vortex."

Timelord.

That's the only word he needed to fall in love with her further that he already was. She was in every way a perfect match for him. Though it was a little disconcerting that Amy and Rory were her parents. " But we've - we've kissed." He puckered his lips in his best kissing face.

" Oh my love, we did far more than that." She purred, kissing him briefly.

" Parents in the room!" Rory shouted, placing the cup of tea down.

The Doctor pulled back and shook his head, panelling a hand through his mass of brown hair, " Parents? I'll never get used to that." He picked up his cup, took a sip of the liquid, and a moment later spat it out, " Bleh! What do you call that?" He shuddered as the foul taste of the hot beverage continued to stain his taste buds.

" It's the American version of tea. We're in New York." Rory explained.

" Well it's disgusting!" The Doctor pulled a face and spluttered, " New York!" He spat, " What happened to good old Leadworth?" He bit his tongue, knowing that he'd said too much already as both the Ponds looked extremely upset.

" The weeping angels." Amy said, looking up at him with pain ridden eyes.

" Ah - I'm sorry." The Doctor lowered his head in respect. He knew that the weeping angels were bad news, and that they were probably the reason for why they couldn't see his original self anymore. He didn't delve into the topic any deeper.

" No need to be sorry you big lump. You're here, aren't you?" Amy's mood lightened dramatically.

" Yup! " He rubbed his hands together, " Of course, if you'll have us." He mumbled, anxious of the answer that he'd receive.

" Course ya can. Can't they Rory?" Amy poked Rory. The Doctor felt a little warm at the prospect of Amy letting them stay. She clearly saw him differently now than she had at the ganger factory.

" Um- yeh." Rory agreed, " Stay as long as you like."

The Doctor let out a crazed laugh. Never in his wieldiest dreams had he imagined having this - a family - a normal life - a wife. It seemed a lifetime ago that having that again had seemed impossible.

But it hadn't been impossible - just a little bit unlikely.

He was The Doctor, and becoming a ganger hadn't been the end of his story, it was the beginning of a million more chapters to come.

* * *

><p><strong>This is the last chapter of this fic but as The Doctor said there's chapters to come. I will be writing a sequel to this. It will involve Ten again! Because I never really did get to explaining what happened to him when The Doctor's ganger left for the library. <strong>

**Remember that whilst you're waiting for me to write and post the sequel you can check out some of my other fan fictions on my profile page. **

**Don't forget to leave one last review x **


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